Savage Dating Service

Looking for:
1) A woman who knows when to keep her trap shut.
2) Doesn't mind if I hit on her sister.
3) Doesn't mind if I piss myself after a night of drinking.
4) A real go getter, a chic who is willing to run to the beer store for me.
5) Has at least $500 in bail money at all times.
6) Cooks all the meals.
7) Accepts criticism with a smile.
8) Must keep clean shave.
9) Doesn't look at other men
10)Willing to have threesomes with other girls