Andy Rooney On Brunettes

I must say that women with brown hair have always attracted me more than others. Perhaps there is some truth to Freudianism. The women in my family are all brunettes. My mother was a brunette, my sister, my grandmother. They're all dead now, but I still fantasize over them.
What is it about a woman with brown hair that makes me want to get to know her privates a little better? I don't understand why my 87 year old cock becomes arroused when I see a pretty brunette. It just does.
Sometimes I find myself playing with my dick in Central Park. Mothers taking their children for a stroll, young ladies jogging with their dogs, and brown muff all over the place.
Who says blondes have more fun? I don't know any blondes who have more fun. Are women with lighter features suddenly the spokespersons for female fun. I remember a young lady by the name of Cyndi Lauper, brunette, who dyed her hair all kinds of punky colors. She said, "Girls just want to have fun."
I'm Andey Rooney, and this is 60 Minutes. I will see you next Sunday, where I will continue to act like a senile old bastard.

*Brunettes of the world, I truly believe that you are the prettiest. I meant to say something sweet about you girls, instead, I drifted off to Rooney world. Life is much simpler there.